Sunday, June 21, 2009

Sexual Tension & Flirting With Women You Want

Ever notice how hard it is to make a women interested once you've initiated a conversation?
Yeap, it's a sucky feeling...

You do all the hard work to approach her, BUT she's showing a COMPLETE lack of interest in what you're saying...

The good news is this is a COMPLETELY common thing! Many guys get these signals from women. In fact, it happens SO often there is a name for it:

"Bitch Shield" is what they call it.

Now don't let it fool you. When a woman uses this defense, it's NOT because she's a mean or angry person...

In fact some of the NICEST girls HAVE to use "The Bitch Shield"

Why?

Because it's their ONE defense against protecting themselves from ANNOYING or LOW STATUS guys. So you're getting that LOOK from a woman, it's probably due to something that you DID or DID NOT do!

Let me explain...

From the moment they get up in the morning to the moment they they go to sleep, girls are bombarded by different men who want to get into their pants and breast.

It's only NATURAL that they develop a SPECIFIC defense mechanism to WEED OUT the losers.

Most women don't have time to find out if a guy is someone that would want to meet. And if they've had 10-15 men approach them in a single night, there is a point where they have ENOUGH with trying to subtly get rid of uninteresting ones.

"The Bitch Shield" is there way of being so MEAN that a guy will get frustrated and walk away.

How do you know when a girl is doing this do you?

Well, you have to look for active signs of DISINTEREST. To find out, look for the moments where she is:

1. Telling you she has a boyfriend

2. Saying rude or abrupt comments

3. Positioning her body away from you

4. Locking you out of a conversation

5. Letting her eye contact wander

6. Showing disinterest in what you're saying

7. Being on guard and defensive to your comments

8. Pulling her friends away to a new location

9. Or simply telling you go the hell away

As I stated before, these behaviors are NOT a woman's fault...

THEY'RE YOURS!

Women judge men by their ACTIONS and BODY LANGUAGE. If you're
not demonstrating high value, then it's only natural that a woman will give you the cold shoulder.

Now if you've approached a number of women, then you know "The
Bitch Shield" can be really intimidating.

What you have to remember that it's important to NOT get upset or angry. Instead try to understand this behavior and THEN find a way to get past it.

The solution is pretty simple. When you first approach a woman, you have to demonstrate that you're NOT trying to hit on her. Instead you have to show that you're just getting her opinion or
asking her a quick question.

The best is to use an effective opener. For instance, when you FIRST approach a group of women, you NEED to immediately demonstrate these qualities:

1. Using subtle negs
2. Talk other women or bring one with you into the set
3. Giving a time constraint
4. Displaying disinterested body language
5. Looking like you're ready about to walk away
6. Not letting her initial "Bitch Shield" affect you

By demonstrating confident mannerisms on your approach, you subtly tell a woman that you're NOT hitting on her AND you aren't going to take up a lot of her time. This will help put her
at ease and make her comfortable with your presence.

Then as the conversation evolves, you look for something called "The Hook Point". This is the point in an approach when a woman start to show classic signs of interest.

So what is the hook point?

Well a hook point is generally ANY moment in a conversation when the group is enjoying your conversation and walks it to continue. It's basically when they STOP being polite (if they were) and genuinely enjoy what you're saying.

It's called the 'hook point' because you've now hooked this girl into wanting you around. Basically she's find something interesting about you and wants to know more!

Once you've reached the hook point, you've can go from your opener to transitioning into the attraction/comfort building stage.

So how do know when you've reached the hook point?

Well the answer is simple. Women demonstrate a number of indicators that show when they're interested and want you around.

Primarily, you can tell when members of a group are at their hook point when they:

* Smile, laugh and genuinely enjoy your conversation
* Face and/or direct their body language towards you
* Tries to bring up additional topics of conversation
* Starts to ask about you (name, job, hobbies, etc.)
* Touches, pushes or playfully teases you
* Responds to your approach techniques.

The question is: Why is this information useful?

Well when you approach a group, you want to keep on using your material until you reach your hook point OR completely crash and burn. Even if the women don't seem particularly interested at first, you MUST keep introducing different things (stories, personality tests, negs) till you reach the hook point.

And if they hook point never arrives, then you've at least gained some practice with your routines. Then you've at LEAST had ONCE more experience with approaching a woman!

Just remember openers and stories are not only used for approaching a woman. They are ALSO great for demonstrate high status and helping you reach that hook point!

And once you've sparked that interest, it becomes MUCH easier to create an attraction building conversation!

1 comment:

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