Do you know why most men fail miserably with women… even those who diligently study and understand the process of attraction?
It’s because they fail to master the ONE crucial part of the attraction process, the “attraction linchpin” that holds everything together. Remove this linchpin, and the whole process fails, no matter how strong the other parts are.
No matter how much you know about creating attraction with women, no matter how much you read, study and take action, you will fail if this one critical part of the “attraction formula” is missing.
What is it? Simply this: personal authority.
Here's the truth: this is where most men are weakest when it comes to attracting, and keeping the women they desire. In fact, almost every divorce, breakup, or “dumping” has its root in the failure of the man to manifest personal authority.
If You Don't Have Personal Authority She WILL Leave You for a Man Who Does
I get more questions on this topic than any other subject, and see more confusion and frustration among men when it comes to understanding and implementing personal authority than anything else.
Why? The answer is simple: there is no place to learn the art and science of personal authority. In fact, personal authority in men is actually discouraged by the public school system, the media, and especially other weak-minded men who are fearful of its power.
Look at how men are portrayed on TV: lumpy, bumbling buffoons who are ruled by the women on the show, foolish clowns who literally trip over their own feet, only to be saved by a heroic female presence.
It may make for good TV, but when men apply this in the real world, it is an outright disaster. When you try to play the “nice guy” and give authority to the woman you’d like to attract, what happens? She flakes on you, tells you, “let’s just be friends,” or, even worse, if you’re already in a relationship, she leaves you for a jerk who most definitely would not make it in the pansy world of TV. Maybe you’ve had this happen to you, too.
The weird thing is, if you talk to women, they don’t know WHY they left or flaked. In fact, they’ll even say, “I should be attracted to him, but I’m not. He does everything for me I thought I wanted, but I’m not attracted to him, and I don’t know why.”
Here’s the big secret: women hate this as much as men do. They hate meeting a man, only to discover there’s no attraction, no “chemistry,” even though he’s the “perfect gentleman,” the tame, submissive little boy they were told by society they wanted and needed.
What’s missing? Personal authority, plain and simple. Women want a man who has a sense of authority about him, because this is what creates attraction. It is a biological fact—women literally cannot resist a man with strong personal authority. Unfortunately, most women are incredibly frustrated because they simply cannot seem to meet a man who understands what authority truly is.
Now, don’t mistake authority with abuse of authority, another mistake most men make. Hollering, screaming, arguing, and telling a woman off is NOT authority—in fact it is the opposite. If you have to resort to these methods, then you have no personal authority.
The Truth About Personal Authority
What, then is true authority? Simply this: the art of getting other people to want to do what you want them to do. That’s it—nothing more, nothing less. But it is very, very rare to meet anyone who has mastered this skill—although most of us have met at least one, once in our life.
See, when you’re in the presence of someone who has true personal authority, you want to be there, you want to spend time with them—there’s something magnetic about them. Think back to a time when you had a teacher or professor you really respected, or perhaps a ball coach or military leader. How do you remember them? Fondly, and with respect, even if they were a hard-ass at times.
Why? Because you knew they had your best interests at heart, and were hard on you to get you to perform at your best. They had incredible personal authority, and everyone remembers them. You may not remember the jerks or the abusers of authority (or you might), and you certainly don’t remember the nerdy nice guys people ran all over, but you sure as heck remember those with a profound personal authority.
Here’s something you may not have observed at the time, something that might not have even registered: how women responded to these men. In case you can’t remember, I’ll tell you: they were intensely attracted to them. If they were a teacher or professor, all the girls giggled over them, while making fun of the nerds and nice guys.
Why? Because authority in and of itself creates attraction—it draws people to you. When you exude true authority, people (especially sexy women) want to be in your presence. They tell others about you. They bring their friends to see you. They can’t get enough of you.
If there was only one thing I could teach all men about attraction, it would be how to develop your own unique personal authority. If you have that—and only that—you can create incredible amounts of attraction wherever you go. But if you don’t have it, your chances of creating sustained attraction are between slim and none, even if you’ve learned every other attraction secret under the sun.
I will boldly say I am uniquely qualified to train both men and women to develop their own personal authority. I have been in situations ranging from structured military service (in the US Navy attack submarine force) to chaotic entrepreneurial and business environments, and I was able to successfully utilize my personal authority in every instance.
I took note of how people responded to me in those situations, then transferred what I’d learned to what I considered to be the ultimate test: using my personal authority to create attraction with the women I desired.
The Ultimate Authority Test
Why did I consider this the ultimate test? Because it flies in the face of what everyone teaches about attraction and dating. In modern society, the woman is supposed to be the one with the authority, and the man is supposed to be sensitive, nice, and adoring.
Well, I’d tried all that garbage, and it just didn’t work. What was interesting though, was, it just didn’t feel right—it was what was supposed to work, but something inside me said there was something very, very wrong. But, I persisted in doing what was “supposed to work” and went on first date, after first date, never getting a second, always being the perfect gentleman. Maybe the same thing has happened to you.
Now, I’m a results oriented type of guy, and I finally got fed up with kisses on the cheek and unreturned phone calls, so I started testing new things. I quit trying to do what society said you were supposed to do, and started doing what I knew worked in the military, and in business. I started using my personal authority.
The effects were dramatic and immediate. All of a sudden, women started approaching me, started calling me, started bothering me. Whereas in the past I couldn’t get a call back after a first date to save my soul, now, they couldn’t wait to see me again, and didn’t want our time together to end. Instead of them not calling, they started calling multiple times—all because I started using my personal authority I’d developed in other, widely disparate venues.
What was really interesting was what they would say to me. Things like, “it’s about time I met a real man” and “it’s to refreshing not be with a momma’s boy,” and my favorite, “I wish there were more men like you.”
And before where there was kisses on the cheek and friendly hugs, now there were steamy nights of passion, and late night phone calls begging me to come over. My favorite of all time was having a friend of mine ditch the guy she was on a date with (at a fancy restaurant) so she could come over and watch a crappy movie with me. She told him she had to “study.” Yeah, we studied all right!
Why would women do this, why were they suddenly aggressive towards me when all I did was show a little personal authority? The answer may surprise you: their biology forces them to. They can’t NOT behave like that—the male behavior of personal authority produces a powerful “attraction reaction” in women, a reaction they have no control over.
The fascinating thing is, looks don’t matter, age doesn’t matter, income doesn’t matter, height doesn’t matter, social status doesn’t matter, as well as any other reason men invent for women not liking them. The only thing that matters is personal authority. Develop that and you can have any woman you want, forever if you want her. Ignore it, and you’ll forever be the guy waiting for the phone to ring while watching crummy TV.